Sharing inspiring stories about finding meaningful employment. Offering encouragement and support. This blog is for Rejection Resilience. Go after your Zest!
The first lesson in finding your calling is patience. Many people lose their chance at greatness by chasing after a job that is the first opening they see. We should wait and prepare patiently for our calling to arise like a star in the sky! It will not rise early. It will not rise late. It will rise in the fullness of time-at the most appropriate moment. you need not worry that you will not be ready. It will not arise until you are. You need not fear that you will miss it or fail to recognize it. It is looking for you even more than you are looking for it. It will help you to fulfill the purpose of your existence and your whole life is leading you toward it.
(From The Rhythm of Life by Matthew Kelly)
In Querying yet another client who has found her work/life balance, I discovered some of her sage advice. To those who have moved or moved back to Lincoln for a do-over, Julie says…say YES to everything!
Whether it is a lunch meeting with a former acquaintance, an interview with a company you know little about, an opportunity to volunteer for a non-profit, say yes every time! Julie attended the Steve Case Entrepreneurship bus tour forum this last fall and reached out to the winner of $100,000, the Omaha company LifeLoops for an opportunity to meet. An opening there could be in her future!
Give yourself time to contemplate the resulting opportunities and move on to the next connection!
She also recommends “Get a Life Coach!” Really…I didn’t prompt her on this one! She has felt that the suggestions, challenges and encouragement that I have offered her have moved her ahead! Good to know!
So get out there and take some risks! Call that former co-worker, attend a meet-up group, join a LinkedIn group.
The energy you put in will sow many dividends for you!
Are you willing to do the work and stay with the discomfort while you craft your way to the next career, or are you going to settle for what you have? Don’t Settle!
Advice from two of my sage clients who were burned out and badly need a career change.
- Be patient! Your breaks will come. Get new job skills! Tighten your belt.
- Do small, manageable things every week, even when you don’t want to. Call someone in your intended field for coffee and pick their brain. You will see progress.
One of these clients was an IT specialist who pursued a change into accounting. The other was an attorney who is now a non-profit executive. They had their fits and starts!
It will take focus, perseverance and support but you can do it!
Quoted in Brene Brown’s book “Daring Greatly”, Teddy Roosevelt has prime words to share about the act of putting oneself out there. These are golden words for the frustrated job seeker:
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is married by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly…..
This is a big decision, to move on from a career that lacks passion and meaning and into the unknown to see if another opportunity could create more satisfaction! There are multiple sources of risk in making a decision to change jobs or enter a new field: economic considerations, future potential, family, relationships with coworkers, the need to learn new skills, the stability of the employer, and many more. Is it worth it? Do you really want to just settle? What impact will this have on your family? Your health?
Two of the factors worth considering are:
The Happiness Criteria: Your career success can be determined by the underlying enjoyment you derive from your work!
The Attitude Factor: Your ability to learn and adapt over time-to deal with new situations, different personalities, and ongoing surprises-and make the most of them will all be key to your success!
Career and Life Options can partner with you to pave the road, craft the path and reinforce the endurance on your way to a more satisfying career and life! Happy New Year!
Adapted from : Embracing Risk in Career Decisions -Harvard Business Review 2015 by Ron Ashkenas
You may hear your self say…”I have reached out, I have had interviews and I am just not getting a job”! It may be time to alter your strategy a bit. Could you go directly to a website vs, “Indeed” to look for openings? Could you make a connection through LinkedIn to a person who works in a company of which you have interest? Could you determine three compelling reasons that this prospective employer should hire you?
In the book “Calming Your Anxious Mind” Jeffery Brantley discusses the Buddhist technique of “Beginner’s Mind”. In truth, each moment is unique. Even though you have seen a thousand sunsets or had 20 job interviews, this particular one has never happened before and will never happen again. Receiving whatever arises as a unique and precious experience is to practice “Beginner’s Mind” and to stay in the moment. By releasing your attachment to outcomes, you free yourself to be open to whatever is next!
It is tempting when you are feeling low about your job search to want to retreat and isolate.
The holidays is just the time when it is so advantageous to stay in circulation, to muster up the courage to talk to a new person at a festive event, to put yourself in the position of meeting someone new.
It doesn’t have to be complicated. With one or two leading questions for conversation starters, you can engage and connect. How about “Tell me about a memorable holiday you have had in the past” or “What is the worst holiday gift you have ever received and did you return it?”
If it is a natural process to share that you are in the midst of a job search, great. Recently, one of my clients got a lead that turned into a job offer….from his hair stylist! Otherwise you may find the other person you are conversing with may have a need you can fulfill or that the person just may be grateful for your lending an ear to their stories!
If your everyday practice is to open to your emotions, to all the people you meet, to all the situations you encounter, without closing down, trusting that you can do that-then that will take you as far as you can go. Pema Chodron
Do you feel as though your skills in your career area need to be updated so you are competitive in todays market? Before you make a decision to go back to school, consider your other options. Are you engaging in some professional reading to discover the latest trends? Entrepreneurship, Fast Company, the Harvard Business Review and INC. magazines are ready sources of information about what is happening in the best companies today. You might pick up some current expressions. Do you know about crowdfunding, on boarding, etc?
For more in depth learning and at low cost, consider Lynda.com. Here you will find 3,5000 web-based tutorials.. Coursera,Udemy and EdX offer hundreds of online classes most of which are free or low cost.
With a certain amount of discipline, you can train yourself without external pressure! Soon you will be welcoming your enhanced skill set and move on to get that next best job!
Negative thoughts can flash across your mind so quickly, you don’t realize they are there. It is tempting to treat them as reality! “I’m never going to get a good job!” To counter-attack, it is helpful to have composed a cue word or phrase…a mantra…to break in and re-direct the thoughts. You might focus on the word(s) “Breathe” or “Let go!” My phrase is “I’m a successful woman and I will continue to be so!”
Lousie Hay and her books are a good source of affirmations to help you move in the direction of positivity. This is a continual quest, to hear the negative and substitute the positive. The repetition of the positive will win out and move you ahead!
Success comes from trying, learning and trying again. Performance confidence rests on your tolerance for uncertainty. You’re not confident about the outcome, but know that if you keep at it, even in the face of failure and self-doubt, you will eventually succeed! This wisdom comes from Adam Price, a psychologist in New York.
Time after time…I am reminded how important rejection resilience is! It takes guts to embark on a job search whether it is your choice or not! The “working worried” stay where they are and dread losing their jobs or staying at their jobs and just withering away!
You have the courage to stay out there, seeking! Congratulations!